I really enjoyed this piece. What really caught my attention was when you began questioning how people even get into the funeral business. It seems like an odd thing for people to be attracted to, considering the subject is so heavily avoided in our culture. To answer your question of "Is it something they have dreamed about since they were little?" with my thoughts, I do not think it was something that crossed their mind as children. Kids are rarely confronted with death, therefore I believe it was an experience later in life that brought this attraction. Maybe a relatives funeral or a near death experience brought a sudden fascination with death, fulfilled through running a funeral business themselves.
Sarah,
This post was very straightforward, well structured and concise. Well done!
You ask good questions (like "Shouldn’t we trust the ones we are close to, to bring together something we would of liked? Why does the ceremony make such a difference to us, considering we are the guest who is not really invited? Is it something they have dreamed about since they were little?I began to wonder if the reason why religion is such a common trend in death is merely because people find comfort in it...How can we be so sure? What do either of those symbols have to do with the core of what the holiday is actually celebrating?") because they are thought-provoking, often have more than one answer, often have answers that affect many people, and contain unique insights.
I also wondered why people are drawn to the funeral industry...I had always thought that perhaps they were creepy and thus had twisted logic, but perhaps they are simply less afraid of death and more interested in money than many of the population.
From Rebecca (Younger) :
To Sarah: Your post made me question what I would like to have happen to me after I die. I honestly don't know, burning my body freaks me out but being in the ground also freaks me out. This line made me laugh, " When in kindergarten when everyone else wanted to be an astronaut or the president, they were saying I want to care for the dead!" I was surprised that I was laughing considering what the subject of this piece was about. I wonder if people do anything else besides bury and cremate people? Good Job.
From Rebecca
From Mom (Older) :
Your blog is thought provoking Sarah. How a society cares for the dead is a very symbolic act. Think of mass graves of thousands of unknowns around the world because of war or disease. Think of the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier in Washington DC...some soldiers bodies are never recovered and this symbol is a monument to those who served the country and were never found. In the case of caring for the dead the society becomes the small society one is surrounded by who carries out the wishes of the deceased. It is an act of respect and love. I have a friend who was involved in the funeral business. He was actually a mortician. He was the son of an owner of a funeral business. He took his responsibilities very seriously and with great care. In addition to carrying out his duties with the deceased he greatly cared how the family was treated as well. Many small funeral homes have been bought by large conglomerates and that explains why this has become more of a big business. It used to be different. After his father died he took the business over but after a while decided to pursue a different career. Things can always seem to be one thing but if ones delves deeper the story is always more complicated.
xoxo, Mom
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To Casey:
Casey,
I found the contrast between your interviews to lead you to some very insightful ideas. This was evident in these sentences, "I think that many teenagers in this society have not yet experienced their most painful moments in life, because they have not experienced many deaths of close friends and family. I wonder if there is something that youth can do to prepare for such an experience." As a teenager who has experienced what death feels like, I can say personally I really don't think we can mentally prepare ourselves. I think after one death you begin to realize that mourning doesn't last forever, it is always with you but it gets better. Yet the feeling of shock and denial are emotions that are inevitable... However, I think it is very important to have your feelings and understand that death is just another part of life, although it is something we wish we could all avoid, it's better to deal with it than to ignore it. I really enjoyed your post, good job!
To Natalie:
Natalie,
I found the flow and tone of your blog to make it a good read. I found your idea of comparing two different generations concerns for death interesting. I think this line really summed up your point, "Unlike my peers, who were more concerned with what might happen after death, my parents were able to think about the living. Maybe it is because they have a family, children, that they began to think about the people they are leaving behind." However, what if someone never creates their own family or has children? Does this mean that they continue thinking like an adolescent? Is it really about what and who is surrounding a person? Or does it have more to do with getting older and understanding who you are more? Your blog did a good job of sparking ideas amongst a reader! Good work.
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